We all want loving, close connection with our partner, but a major conflict is emerging: we have also come to expect immediate responses to that text, email, or facebook post. When we respond to the ‘other,’ it leaves our partner alone, feeling neglected and disconnected. In fact, recent research shows that 70 percent of face-to-face conversations stop in their tracks the minute the partner texts or answers the phone. Other research shows that the quality of conversation drops with a smartphone just being in the same room. Conflicts are significantly higher, and relationship satisfaction lower. Technology is here to stay. If you want a satisfying, meaningful relationship, you need to have a frank conversation about the ‘rules of engagement’; for starters, when should it be shut off (eg. in the car, at mealtime, at bedtime)? Then honor it.
If you need some help talking about technology, or anything else, in your relationship, take the first step: Talk to Fran.